Insight

Over the past week I've been spending more time with friends and meeting their friends. One of the things that this has prompted is me having to answer the question "what are your plans?" and "do you want to teach as your career?" This has forced me to think a bit about that answer. It used to be that I was dead set on going to law school in order to go into education policy. But the more time I spend in the classroom the more it seems to be the place I belong. I'm comfortable there, I feel most at ease and in my element. Going into policy or law school might not be completely out of my element, but I tend to get nervous and get things like performance anxiety. Teaching has forced a lot of that out of me. I rarely get nervous public speaking now, and even today I played the piano with other people in the room (it was not a performance, but I didn't used to be able to even play with other people around). That is beginning to change. And I feel like it is changing because this is what I'm supposed to be doing. What if policy doesn't really change anything? I hate working in offices and doing research papers without feeling like I am actually changing things. Maybe I'm supposed to be in the classroom, maybe that's my role.

I'm going to articulate this better later, now I have to start showing Blood Diamond for the kiddies.